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About Deviant stella-zimFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 5 Years
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My life revolves around numbers
That never bend even if I make a blunder.
Twelve, eleven, ten, nine
Hours tick away the time
Eight, seven, six, five
For each and every point I strive.
Four, three, two, one
Time until the exam is done.
Minutes have ceased to matter
As I live for the next year, month, day, or hour.
No longer is it about living for today.
We're all living for numbers either way.
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It goes on
The future keeps rushing towards me
Faster and faster and faster
But I'm not ready for the disaster
The world keeps moving
Around and around and around
Without anything improving
Everyone else is moving on
Running and running and running
But when I notice they're already gone
People urge me forward
Pushing and pushing and pushing
But I can't help but feel cornered
People keep making fun
Laughing and laughing and laughing
It almost makes me reach for a gun
Life should go on
Living and living and living
But in the blink of an eye I could be gone
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All seems lost
Like nothing will ever be right
Like the night will never end
And the darkness will consume
Everything that's good and light.
But then there's a spark
A change in the blackness
A light leading the way.
The steady flame of friendship
The burning flash of love
Something that lightens the dark
Lightens a burden
Lightens a mood.
Sometimes small and insignificant
Sometimes life-changing
Earth shattering.
There's always an end to the darkness
Always a light at the end of the tunnel.
Just look for that spark
Grasp it and never let go
Never forget the light in your life
But always remember the dark as well.
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Dream of a Better Place
I used to dream
Of a place downstream
Where love was real
And people could feel
Without too much pain
Where there was never rain
And the skies were clear and blue
I used to believe
That I would never grieve
In a world of wonder
Where I would never fall under
The pain of depression
Or the feeling of opression
And love would always reign
This dream I had
Where nothing was bad
Where life was full of joy
And there was a special boy
Who loved me for me
and not who I might be
This dream could become a reality
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Hearts beating
Sweaty palms
Hitched breathing
Stuttered voices.
Reactions to an attraction.
Instinctual and uncontrolled
You can't help who you love.
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There was a girl
Who lived long ago
And she was happy
At least she thought so.
She had a family who loved her
Friends who cared
But she always wondered
What more was out there.
Were there dragons and mermaids?
Were there damsels and knights?
Were there mountains that reached
Incredible heights?
And she always wondered
Where she really belonged.
She dreamt of a place
She heard in a song.
A place full of peril
And wonders galore,
A place where she was herself
Who could ever ask for more?
So she searched and she looked
But never could find
That wondrous place she
Saw in her mind
So she lived her life
As happy as she could be
But the tiniest part of her
Wondered what would be
If she had found her song,
Her wish come true.
If she had finally done
What she had set out to do.
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You Made Me Who I Am
You made me who I am today
And for that I'm forever grateful
But never mistakes that gratefulness
As a promise to be faithful.
You broke my heart
But made me strong
And braver than before
But that doesn't mean
That I'll ever love you anymore.
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Eyes to See
Eyes to see
Ears to hear
The suffering all around
With feet planted firmly on the ground
Stand still and hear
The cries of the hungry
See the poor on the streets
Will you do nothing?
Can you only see and hear?
What good is it to see if we cannot feel?
What good is it to hear if we cannot hear what's real?
Why listen and watch if we do nothing to remedy
The pain and suffering we see and hear?
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If We Could Go Back In Time
If we could go back in time
And save ourselves from heartbreak and pain
Would we?
Could we make our lives better if we knew the outcome?
But who would we hurt in the process?
Whose lives would we uproot for one moment of happiness?
If we could go back in time
And save innocent lives
Would we?
But if we saved a life in one moment
What would the rest of their lives hold?
What horrors would wait for them then?
If we could go back in time
what chaos would we create
By trying to "fix" things?
Would we destroy everything we know and love?
If we could go back in time
Would we?
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The future
My future lies before me
But you're standing in the way.
I can't see around you
To see the light of day.
You're blocking all my sunlight
An leaving me in the dark
And stopping me from hearing
The singing of the lark.
You stop my steps
And hold me back
And keep me from my goals.
I can't see my way
To keep from falling into holes.
You have to leave me be
You have to let me go
'Cause sometime in the future
I'll have to be alone.
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I'm afraid to be alone with my thoughts.
Afraid of where they'll take me.
Yet it seems that's where I always end up.
Thinking. Alone.
Agony of broken hearts and friendships is renewed.
The tears keep flowing.
The pain is ever present.
I try to tell myself that I don't care
But it never works.
The pain is overwhelming.
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Does anyone truly see?
When you walk down the hall
Do you look at the people around you?
Or do you just focus on your destination?
Do you ever make eye contact
With someone you don't really know?
What do you do?
Do you smile? Nod?
Or do you just look away
And pretend it never happened?
What would happen
If you actually said hello?
When you look at your friends
Do you actually see them?
Do you notice their sadness
Or happiness or anger in their eyes?
The tension in their muscles?
The finger shaped bruises on her arm?
Can you see any of it?
Or do you just glance and look away?
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Who am I?
Who am I?
Blonde hair
Green eyes.
It describes me
But not who I am.
Friendly, nice,
Such bland, meaningless words.
How can words
So simple and flat
Ever describe the complexities
Of a human being.
How can I find words
To describe myself?
How do I know
Who I really am?
Some people never know,
Never figure themselves out.
And yet,
Everyone wants to know who I am.
How can I know?
I've barely lived.
I'm still living,
Still growing,
Still learning,
Still figuring it out.
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One person
One person called me beautiful.
That's all it took.
Just that one word
To make my spirit soar.
One person to say good morning
Good Night
Sweet Dreams.
And one person to tear my world apart.
To take my spirit
And lock it away.
One person.
One life.
One broken heart.
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Here I am
Here I am to listen
Here I am to fix what's wrong
Here I am to tell you
It was you that was strong
Here I am to hold you
Here I am to stand by your side
Here I am to tell you
Who it was that lied
Here I am to tell you
I'm not who you think
Here I am to say
Your presence makes me shrink
Here I am to tell you
That I'm done following behind
Here I am to tell you
I've got a new friend to find
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Timid Little Mouse
Who I used to be
Is not who I am.
That timid little mouse you met
Is no longer around.
I'm stronger and I'm louder
I'm braver and I'm proud
To be this better version
Of that timid little mouse.
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Add a Comment:
Zeles93 Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
thanks for the fave! ^^
pencilxpusher Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
you are a very nice writer keep on writing! if you ever need any tips or critiques for your work I will totally be here. just shoot me a note!
stella-zim Featured By Owner Nov 2, 2012